One More Decision

It has been such a long time since my last post. To catch everyone up I will fill in some details. Well, I discussed my diagnosis in an earlier post but here are some specifics: I have Invasive ductal carcinoma, ER/PR negative with HER2 negative, Grade 2, Basel cell are present,  the Margins are clean,  had a Sentinel lymph node biopsy that was negative, and overall I have GRADE 1 Breast Cancer.  Sounds impressive doesn’t it however that’s not even half of what I should know. I have spent hours listening to my doctors and nurses then I go home spending hours with my nose in Breast Cancer books and more time perusing the internet. I don’t have enough information to make an informed consent. There are times when some of the test I have had done that come back as negative but because of the method of testing will turn out to be positive.

It is maddening to come to a final decision. At first, I believed I would walk into a Dr’s office he would tell me the best treatment I would worry over the side effects then schedule the first treatment but of course being a Crouse/Spies we don’t do things the easy way. After meeting with my Oncology Doctors’ there was a bump in the road, my Chemotherapy doc wants me to take part in a Clinical Trial. So now, I have to explore two different drug regimes that come with different side effects. Some of the long term side effects are Cardiac in nature vs. Leukemia plus so much more. How is a person supposed to consider putting poison in your body that will kill you in 15 years? OMG this is mind-boggling.
Also consider the scenario of coming  up with a treatment plan and it turns out to be the wrong treatment sometimes the lab performs the test incorrectly or the method of testing for your specific cancer is incorrect there are times when HER2 can be negative and positive at the same time. This information sounds “Sci-Fi” but it happens. I feel I am on a precipice waiting to take the plunge. All I want is to be told which treatment is best for me and get on with this diagnosis. I announced that I have the big “C” on January 7 and it is now March 16 come on Karen get your ass in gear and get this moving. The real hard stuff is yet to come and I am tired of thinking about it and saying “oh I have Cancer” “I better not I have Cancer” this is not me. Get the diagnosis do research and start the treatments!